Did you know that there's an American Institute of Stress?

Yeah.

I was mid-scroll doing some research for an upcoming project, and there it was - a link to an

the organization solely dedicated to the overwhelm-related stress epidemic.

Talk about a "holy moly" reminder that THIS is where we are.

It's no wonder, though, right?

There are an infinite number of things we could do (and feel like we have to do), and a limited amount

of time and energy that we have at our disposal.

As a stay-at-home mom, a business owner, an author, a business director for a friend's business, and

an Army Reservist, and the future director of a non-profit dedicated to helping kids develop

confidence (shhh - you're the first one to hear, and there's a ton of work still required), I absolutely

feel the overwhelming tug knocking at my door on the daily.

But left unchecked, overwhelmed, and too-much-to-do stress can derail us and completely

keep us from living happy, fulfilled lives.

The Effects of Too-Much-to-Do Stress

Now, there are many well-known adverse effects of stress. But besides our health, there are several

other things that being overwhelmed does to us:

Decreased Focus

When we have too much going on, prioritizing and minimizing distractions can be tricky. Think about it

- if you've got a mile-long to-do list, with a presentation to finish, cupcakes to bake for school, a

house to clean before the in-law's visit,, 3,762 emails in your inbox, and everything else that NEEDS

your attention, it's going to be pretty hard to concentrate on the task at hand. Plus, when we start

thinking about how our tasks outweigh our time and energy available, we have a physical reaction -

stress hormones. Those bad boys (although very useful in life-threatening situations) wreak

havoc in the long term AND make it very hard to focus on the task.

Impacted Relationships

Have you ever been spending time with someone, then started thinking about the other thing you

have to do, and suddenly realize you haven't heard a word they said for the last 3 minutes?

I have. And it's pretty crappy.

I don't want to waste my time with the people I love because I'm distracted and overwhelmed.

And I don't want to be distracted at work either because I've got some big goals, and - if I'm being

honest - I want to accomplish them quickly and efficiently so I can go back to spending time with my

family and catching up on my Kindle reading.

Defeated Subconscious

This is one thing we don't often think about when it comes to being overwhelmed - how it affects our

subconscious.

When we have too much on our plates and no great way to handle them, we tend to get

disorganized and miss deadlines. Then, our subconscious says, "I can't get it together," "I never get

anything done on time," or another equally unhelpful phrase.

And that, my friend, does not lead to confidence and motivation to achieve our big dreams and

creating lives that make us excited to get out of bed in the morning.

So what are we to do?

The Good News: Work-Life Balance isn't as Elusive as We Think

Whew - work-life balance.

It's a topic that almost makes me cringe when I think about it.

And that's because I believe the idea of having a perfectly balanced life

has gotten waaaaay out of control somewhere along the way.

Can you do all the things?

Maybe

Can you do all the things at the same time?

Nope.

Can you do all the things in equal amounts?

Uh...…. (Is this even a real question...? Who wants this? I sure as heck don't.)

I think part of that part of the answer to reducing feelings of overwhelm is to reframe how we define

"balance."

One of the things I disagree with in the unhealthy view of balance is that we have to be all the

things to all the people, and have to keep everything in these excellent neat containers where

everything is compartmentalized and equal.

Life isn't like that.

Life is messy.

This idea of dedicating equal and even amounts of our time to each area of our life (career, family,

community, self-care, finances, etc.) is unrealistic and adds a lot of stress to our lives.

It's another form of perfectionism and living up to an arbitrary set of standards that only leads to more

stress.

What I propose instead is to cut out this extra layer of stress and think of "balance" more in terms of

"harmony."

Here's how I like to think of it

Create More Work-Life Balance by Thinking about Food

Yep, food.

Now when folks talk about eating a balanced meal, it doesn't mean that there's an equal amount of

protein, gains, veggies, fruit, and dairy on your plate.

It means that you have these things IN PROPORTION.

And it doesn't even tell you to want the same amount of each item daily.

Some days you might have a hard workout or do a lot of physical labor, and you'll want

more protein.

Some days you might want to detox, so you go for extra veggies.

And some days (or months - I'm looking at you, October through April), there's just a ton of candy and

Girl Scout cookies around, and well, Let's say I'm always game for a box of Thin Mints.

You get the picture, though - just like a balanced meal doesn't mean equal, a balanced life doesn't

have to tell similar, either.

Just like a balanced meal doesn't mean equal, a balanced life doesn't have to mean equal.

You Get to Decide what Life Balance Means to You

You get to choose.

Feels pretty good eh? Just typing that made me sigh and relay a little 😉

Sometimes you may be pushing hard in your career, so other stuff takes a back burner.

Sometimes you may be focused on relationships and family, so that's where most of your focus goes.

The point is 11000% support figuring out what your ideal vision of balance/harmony looks like for you

and going with it.

And you are then changing it as you go along too.

You get to decide what a balanced life looks like to you. Only then do I recommend going out and

figuring out how to put all the pieces together.

Because the one thing we DON'T need is to be dumping extra stress on ourselves for not

having the perfect amount of time dedicated to meeting unrealistic expectations.

Just a little food for thought (cheesy pun - HAHA, I did it again - intended).

Until next time, I invite you to look at how overwhelmed is affecting you (because G.I. Joe says that

knowing is half the battle) and see if changing your work-life balance perspective might be helpful.

And, of course, I'd love to hear from you! What's your biggest struggle when it comes to getting

everything done?

Jewell "Hunting Harmony" Siebert